124; element of rebellion in our veins
Wednesday, June 8, 2005

well, today was a day with somewhat turmoiled emotions. my feelings are very much in a swirl. one side in optimism about today, the other very much on cynicism and pessimistic. and frankly speaking, it has been an emotionally draining day for me. seriously draining.

ok, as some of you might have known through reading of my previous posts and also my tagboard, i had a test today. by the dear mrs liang. (eww, cant believe i am using the word dear to be describing a teacher like her. i must be practising euphemism, i reckon.) so okie. technically, we were uber nervous; she was testing us on a topic that she herself claimed to have yet be completed.

i was hell reluctant to get to school today. simply because my cramming the previous day, that being yesterday, went on till four. and i slept before getting up at five. and knowing that it would be pointless if i skipped the whole thing, i forced myself to get to the toilet and get ready for school.

the truth remains that i could have had a few hours of lie in. but i thought that i should come earlier to cover some elements of the topic of social studies that i missed out. which helped actually.

the school was pitch black; bear in mind that on school holidays, activities are later than usual, and i came earlier that the normal school timing. my mind was thinking of all the nasty concoctions of ghost stories that i watched and i was freaking out. but i managed the calm my senses and head to the canteen and prepare for the test.

i was cramming about everything from merger to separation of singapore and so on and so forth. and it was getting on my nerves. somewhat very worrying to me. all her threats about the whole weightage nonsense and so on and so forth. but the day was just starting to get bitchy.

mrs liang sms enzali and told her that she will be late. her sms drove everyone nuts. some people went off, not bothering about the whole exam. it was understandable. especially after all her claims about this being serious and all that. ak was uber pissed along with yanyi and daphne and nicole and practically everyone. i was shaking; apparent everyone at my table was ready to gorge mrs liang's eyes out or even something under worser circumstances. evelyn looked as though she was ready to stuff cyanide into mrs liang's mouth.

man. what an uncomfortable situation.

then, something just happened. i managed to use propaganda to ask everyone to ditch this whole thing. but actually it was generally everyone's idea. and not really one's idea on their own. seemingly, the whole of 3c had a meeting and discussing about the ditching plan. and we were going on with it! how cool was that?! our goody-two-shoes class finally has one high-class scandal. impressive is one comment to make of the incident.

but stupid xx. trying to be good and refined student i guess. xx threatened to report us if we try and attempt to escape. and evelyn and i were like talking about how pathetic xx was. we were sure and totally positive that xx would put his creative juices into test and make up his own make up of his own version, dramatised. thats what xx has ALWAYS been doing. even from last year.

but we didnt care. the desire to be bad and naughty was pulpitating in our veins and we really wanted to be doing something rebellious, regardless of its consequences. and so we all moved out. slowly in small groups. but somehow, glitches were beginning to appear with everyone debating about how much mrs liang sucks that she is so late and that we got to bear with her atrocities.

so with much apprehension and driven by xx's threat, we all went back to school. everyone was pissed with xx. xx tried making a joke with sufyan but all that he received were cold stares from all and vulgarities from nicole and some demoralizing words from daphne! rocks. xx deserves it! HAH.

ok, it is clear that i am chastising everything that has been happening. but oh wells. since well wasnt i critical of everything?

so we had to go through the torturous papers. but overall it was ok. at one point, while we were having break, we entered the class. and that mrs liang said that we were late when she plainly didnt say anything about the time. what pathetic behavior. and she had the cheek to ask us for something to pay her back. just cause she bought us fifty cent assortments. damn her. so low.

i really dont care if someone comes snooping around and punishing me for defamation and libel or whatever shit. i am sure that victoria wouldnt mind referring me to ms wu ye-min who would give a lengthy speech about INTERNET - THE LAND OF FREE SPEECH.

so after the whole bout of tests, zihao, yuxue, ak and me were supposed to go for a movie. but since zihao and yuxue wanted to go to play table tennis, ak and i decided to do something constructive and i agreed to be helping her with looking of certain items for her nco camp.

not long after the four of us were reunited at the movie theatre and we were watching madagascar. this would be those shows where i would be at a standstill as to how to rate it. simply because, certain parts were way hilarious, while those boring parts were downright dull. so i shall be neutral in its judgement. but it is rather comical and good for people who arent too critical. which clearly isnt for me.

somehow i dont know why, yuxue and zihao were fairly distant from ak and me. okie. although we were separated by a small aisle, i dont understand why they didnt like joke or anything. really felt like total strangers. immediately after the whole thing, we made our moves. saw zihao again at the interchange. and he was kinda fun. i dont know why, the connection among me and him is very much stagnant or rather on and off. there are times when i just want to confide in him as a friend, but am unable to. oh wells. sometimes things just seem to bleak.

at home, haiguang came to talk with my mother about alken and me. really, i dont want to elaborate. i just feel like breaking down again.