247; darkness and gloom
Sunday, April 15, 2007

it's been a while since i've anything positive to post here. and today is no exception. i'm still on the line of negativity. since i'm discussing the fact that i miss my nanyang experience.

don't get me wrong. saying this doesn't mean that i'm against the fact that i'm now in anderson. i've great friends. yijia, kathy, wenson, jonathan, whom i'm studying with weekly. laughing with my beloved classmates during breaks. doing work with huiqun, yiyao, huilong and all.

however, i don't deny that i miss my nanyang friends. though the news that nigel gave me is pretty grim. i've found out that og 25 is barely there anymore. it seems that everyone has really gelled with their respective friends. i'm torn, i never thought that it'd happen.

i understand that everyone will find new friends. i just thought, irregardless of what happens, the spirit of og25 will carry on. so much for harbouring such stupid hopes. also, i can somehow tell that nigel is hurting over the separation of the group.

*exhales.

it seems only yesterday that i was in nanyang jc's hall, screaming myself hoarse, cheering on with the group. having dinner late at night. going sentosa and trekking to the various stations. we were so bonded. although we didn't win the best og, we KNEW that we were the best og.

the best people. the best friendships. the best laughter. the best memories.

shengli, tanisha, crystal, zhihui, nigel, tzekai, shuhui, novell, grace, anabel, waisan, weihan, kelvin, nat, chunghiang, james, carine, zhiyin, hongsiang.

some names are not mentioned cause they didnt really hang with us, or they've withdrew to go into polytechnics.

they are my best friends. but somehow, i start questioning whether the word 'are' should be replaced by 'were'.

perhaps it's high time that i come to terms with the fact that more often than not, friendships just come and go. not everything will last, no matter how much i treasure it.

ct0720.

the best classmates in my life. i never felt as bonded before. laughing together, going for outings. it's just so cool. they became my family after being transferred from 0727 to 0720. i felt highly ostracised in twenty-seven, perhaps the combinations in that class amounted to the dozens. but in twenty, although i'm the only geography student, i was accepted and had wonderful friends.

ANNIS, HONGHAO, ATIQAH (who also went to andersonjc), adeline, yingyu, shiqi, ian, weiliang, terence (bigbro!), huiting, huijie, pamela (laughing queen!), cheryl, xinying, chunyang, khengmeng (IT whiz!), shikun,yanyu and basith (went to yishunjc)

i miss them and all the memories we shared. another sad news? laughs. annis told me that half of the class is now taking higher one econs, while the rest remains as higher two economics students.

therefore, new classmates, new groups.

saddening.

MLCS!!

the greatest friends i've made. syimah, filza, amalina, izeen, zul, ain kecik, ain, deena, dina, nana, khairul, haikal, mardhiah, khad and the rest.

it's been great being friends with them and not just cause we shared the best time at the youth space at junction 8. the gpa event we've held really strengthened bonds between us, especially when times got rough and unpredictable. meetings weren't just formal discussions, but times where we poured out problems and shared secrets.

it's really enjoyable. i remember the first time, i thought mlcs was a bore, having seen the boring activities in primary and secondary school. nanyang's mlcs is the best in the universe and milky way! laughs.

i really miss them.

in anderson, whenever i want to be crazy, it's just so hard, because i feel that hardly anyone understands my craziness. though my friends are fun, sometimes they think i'm just nuts. in nanyang, it was so easy to laugh, cause everyone laughed along! and i miss doing that.

i do feel sad. nanyang EXPERENCIA was the best thing ever! although i remember lyana telling me that i can always come back to visit, it just wouldnt be the same thing anymore, as i'm still an anderson student, whether i like it or not.

and i will never forget what joy of anderson, who was from nanyang asked me. she asked why i've changed so drastically, from that guy who laughed his ass off in nanyang, to the reserved and quieter boy in anderson.

i guess it boils down to me being something that i'm not. because i don't feel that the environment in anderson allows me to be the same. every morning, all the announcements by miss leong just tells me that anderson is a serious environment. like all work, and no play.

it was just different in nanyang. just soooo different.

but i've made a choice. and i'll have to live with it.